


is it condescending to be so scared i might hurt you?

by deereynolds



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-22
Updated: 2015-12-22
Packaged: 2018-05-08 08:58:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5491355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deereynolds/pseuds/deereynolds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>dee shrugs, and this time (in less of a horrible, hung over, rush) she pulls her own shirt over her head.  “maybe i’m still a little drunk.”<br/>the waitress’ face falls. “i wish you wouldn’t drink.”<br/>she wants to put on a front.  why do you care? because who the fuck actually cares if sweet dee reynolds gets drunk again? answer: her sober, alcoholics anonymous girlfriend.  fuck, dee.  she’s not your girlfriend. “if i didn’t drink, i wouldn’t fuck you.” if i didn’t fuck you, no one would.<br/>the waitress’ face twists into a sour, hurt expression. “you’re right.  you should go.”<br/>dee slips into her skinny jeans and makes sure to slam the door behind her.  </i><br/>angst and sex starring dee and the waitress.</p>
            </blockquote>





	is it condescending to be so scared i might hurt you?

**Author's Note:**

> this is for taylor sorry i couldnt send it in the mail and sorry its like 3 months later than i said id get it to you

if there’s one thing she’s absolutely certain of, it’s that she has absolutely zero feelings for the waitress. for christ’s sake, she doesn’t even refer to the girl by her own name. she’s staring at the ceiling, watching her fan spin round and round. ignoring the waitress’ soft breathing next to her. it’s good to be sure of something.  
“i should go.”  
there’s no point in saying it. the waitress is asleep. dee can’t believe that she’s not just sneaking out as usual. the waitress stirs and rolls over. “do you have to?”  
she doesn’t have to go. the only obligations she has are go to the bar, get drunk, go home, booty call the waitress and repeat. she could cut out the middle man. just stay in bed with her a little while longer. “i don’t want to stay.”  
she gets up and starts throwing on clothes, which unfortunately happen to be the other girl’s. (the other girl who’s half her size.) “shit, dee.” the waitress sighs, getting out of bed and helping dee out of her clothes. “what’s going on with you?” she’s grinning and laughing. trying to make dee’s stupidity less of a problem.  
dee shrugs, and this time (in less of a horrible, hung over, rush) she pulls her own shirt over her head. “maybe i’m still a little drunk.”  
the waitress’ face falls. “i wish you wouldn’t drink.”  
she wants to put on a front. why do you care? because who the fuck actually cares if sweet dee reynolds gets drunk again? answer: her sober, alcoholics anonymous girlfriend. fuck, dee. she’s not your girlfriend. “if i didn’t drink, i wouldn’t fuck you.” if i didn’t fuck you, no one would.  
the waitress’ face twists into a sour, hurt expression. “you’re right. you should go.”  
dee slips into her skinny jeans and makes sure to slam the door behind her.   
xxx  
the next day it’s just like it never happened. dee tags along with charlie to the coffee shop, doesn’t even look twice at the waitress.   
the waitress is just as subtle. she avoids their table as usual, someone else can get that. she doesn’t deserve this: having to serve the two people she hated most in this world. she hated dee. but whenever night rolls around, that hatred is stifled by her need to self destruct.   
she’s drawn out of her internal monologue by dee’s shrill, loud voice. “the women’s room is a mess.”  
she fumes. “i’m a waitress, not your janitor.” dee gives her this shocked unblinking look.   
“i’m telling you, it needs cleaned. let me show you.”  
right, so that’s what she wants. a quicky in her place of work. “fuck off, dee.” even though her words are harsh, she still follows the taller girl into the women’s room.   
dee is quick to pull the waitress into a stall, slamming her against the door. “you wanna do this on the toilet, dee?” she laughs.  
and dee, being the disgusting person she is, just nods, pulling the waitress’ jeans down around her ankles and pushing her down onto the toilet seat. disgusting. she feels dee trace kisses on her inner thighs, working inward. disgusting. now she’s using her tongue. disgusting. the waitress is sweating, panting besides herself. this is disgusting. but it feels good, so she’s stopped caring.   
(she’ll just take a shower or two when she gets off.)  
xxx  
she steps out of the shower to a beeping phone. dee, too lazy for a booty call decided to text. she hits dial without thinking.   
“i don’t think you should come over tonight.” she blurts it out as soon as the receiver on the other end clicks.   
dee’s whiny voice pierces her eardrum. “come on waitress, don’t be selfish.”   
“selfish?” it’s all she has the energy to say. she’s given up on the whole being-called-her-name thing.  
“yeah, selfish. the only way this relationship is gonna work is if we get each other off.”  
“relationship?” that doesn’t seem right to her. this wasn’t a relationship, well at least not a good one. she hadn’t sunk so low that she was dee reynolds’ girlfriend, right? right?  
“yeah, relationship. i guess. we can talk about it if you let me come over.”  
she agrees, reluctantly.   
dee is there in fifteen minutes.   
xxx  
“i’m actually in a relationship,” the waitress giggles at the guy who’d just asked for her number. with dee reynolds. “we’re pretty serious.   
“pretty serious?”  
“yeah.” it’s unfortunate, she let herself get trapped by dee reynolds.   
xxx  
dee snores. loudly. the waitress found this out the first night she ever slept over. but it’s grown on her. she’s grown on her. in all her alcoholic glory, dee was just what the waitress needed.   
xxx  
“i’m in a relationship. it’s very serious.”  
xxx  
“we never go out,” the waitress brings up one night.  
“can’t risk charlie catching us. you know that. the kid’s crazy.” dee says, undoing her jeans. the waitress slaps her hand away.  
“i’m serious, though. if we’re gonna be girlfriends we should go to dinner every once in awhile.”  
dee goes blank. “waitress--”  
“my name is--”  
“no, no.” she covers her mouth with her hand. “no. i think this will be easier if i don’t know your name.” she sighs. “i don’t feel that way about you. i only said that stuff about a relationship because you’re the best sex i’ve ever had.”  
“what?”  
“i’m only interested in you sexually-- i don’t want this thing we have to get serious.”  
“but we’re already serious.” she’s having chest pains, like this may actually kill her. “dee, i love you.”  
“and i shouldn’t have let you get so attached to me…”  
twist the knife, why don’t you?   
xxx  
dee still comes to the coffee shop with charlie. the waitress always spits in her drink.


End file.
